Misconceptions

For the last time I don't know what it is like in the future, but if you keep up this line of questioning I could hazard a pretty good guess.

Needs Must

Just hold it steady and make sure the safety is off, trust me it's easier than you think.  You're gonna be great.

Boundaries

For the last time I'm not looking at it.  You're the one who cosied up to a stray at the office party and you're the one whose going to drag themselves to the doctor and explain why you make such bad life decisions.

Travesty

Really, putting on make-up in the forecourt? You know those horns aren't blasting out support? Is this how it will be from now on?

Dilemma

You called it, faker than a politician's smile. I take it we are still going in?

Spiritual Matters

Cod is a fish, God is a deity.  I can see the confusion but if you make that mistake again we're going to be branded as a retard.

The Endless Struggle

Shame your fat chum drank all the Dr. Pepper we'll just have to make do.  I say go for the Pepsi, it's not Max but trust me it's better than the Coca-Cola.  

In Treatment

Jesus, this is revolting, what kind of stupid Edwardian logic is this Poppins lady advocating?  The only thing that's going to keep this radiotherapy down is a big fat bale of weed.  

Party At Nan's

You're throwing off my timing and by the looks your relatives are throwing our way we've hit a new level of disdain.  It's left leg in, right leg out.  I can't simplify it anymore.  

Not Again

If you wanted a warm place to rest your genitals I'd have knocked you up a hot water bottle.  Is this really how you want to ring in the new year?  I mean look at them.  Snoring away precious eating time while the remnants of last nights nibbles clog up their nostrils.  I'm going for a walk and I expect the house to be quieter when I return.